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Things Radio Engineers say

We are a strange group sometimes, I will admit. However, some of the things I hear my fellow engineers say are rather humorous, even to me. Apropos nothing at all:

Toyota Prius?  I would be caught dead in one of those things.  I want a car that belches black smoke and the tires squeal when I step on the gas.

When connecting a satellite feed which was silent but supposed to be carrying live programming:

That was not as loud as thought it would be.

When discussing working overseas in various locations:

When I was in the Philippines, they have this stuff called baloot or bolute or something.  It is a partially incubated chicken egg.  You break it open and the embryo is in there.  It was like eating a chicken abortion.

Things said to the general manager:

But it can be fixed, you just haven’t written a big enough check yet.

Yes, I am aware that we are off the air.  Unfortunately, every time I start to work on the transmitter, the general manager calls to ask if I am aware that we are off the air.

When discussing the qualities of various car rental agencies:

If it is a rental, no need to be gentle

An irate FCC inspector, upon getting lost while trying to find an AM monitor point. The license was rolled up into a tube and he was smacking the dashboard of the car with it:

Is this your license, or is this a joke?

After a DJ explains why she did not put the back transmitter on the air:

You are off the air, I don’t know how you could mess things up more than that

There are many more, I am sure after I post this, I will add to it.

Axiom


A pessimist sees the glass as half empty. An optimist sees the glass as half full. The engineer sees the glass as twice the size it needs to be.

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.
~1st amendment to the United States Constitution

Any society that would give up a little liberty to gain a little security will deserve neither and lose both.
~Benjamin Franklin

The individual has always had to struggle to keep from being overwhelmed by the tribe. To be your own man is hard business. If you try it, you will be lonely often, and sometimes frightened. But no price is too high to pay for the privilege of owning yourself.
~Rudyard Kipling

Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes the freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers
~Universal Declaration Of Human Rights, Article 19

...radio was discovered, and not invented, and that these frequencies and principles were always in existence long before man was aware of them. Therefore, no one owns them. They are there as free as sunlight, which is a higher frequency form of the same energy.
~Alan Weiner

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